Friends, my life is rife with guilty pleasures. So many, in fact, that they may now outnumber the “normal” ones. I used to actively deny some of these things, but the older I get, the more willing I am to admit to them freely. These guilty pleasures of mine fall under all the big categories: bands, books, games, movies, and, my favorite, TV shows. I could name many right now, but my current bad TV obsession is Pretty Little Liars. Yes. I am watching it even as I type this.
Bad TV is really great for innumerable reasons, and bad teen TV is by far the greatest of all. The bad acting! The overwrought drama! The unbearable angst! TV high school is so fantastically unlike actual high school, and something about that entertains me to no end. This show is no different, gentlefolk. Insanely gorgeous teenage girls with perfect makeup and – this is my true source of intrigue, perhaps predictably – IMPOSSIBLE HAIR! Oh, the hair!
Look, guys. These girls are supposed to be in 10th grade. I don’t know about y’all, but that was the year that I learned flat irons existed. Not started using them, mind you, but just found out that there was any such thing! Let’s not even discuss how old I was when I realized how many people were getting highlights… But these girls, they are rocking some serious salon blowouts, like, 24/7. I spend every episode trying to calculate what time we’re meant to believe they get up in the morning to do their hair (math is not one of my many guilty pleasures, as it turns out.) But really, when I was 16, I had to be at school at… 7:45? 8:15? I’ll be honest, I really can’t remember, but I do remember that I was rolling out of bed at 7:20, throwing on some eyeliner (okay, a bunch of eyeliner), and then heading to my carpool’s meeting place only to probably walk to school anyway because I’d already been left (thanks, Kyle!) I’m being gracious to my teen self by even just assuming that I brushed my hair somewhere in there. The blow-dryer I shared with my mom (which still resides in my parents’ bathroom cabinet) may have been older than I was. Alright, it probably wasn’t, but it was definitely a cheap ‘90s model which suited quite well our only other styling tools – two crimping irons of varying sizes. If this has somehow not painted a clear enough picture, let’s just say that Victoria’s Secret hair was not a part of my high school career. And in my defense, I can’t remember anyone else having that going on, either.
What about you guys? Were you getting up at the crack of dawn to wash, blow dry, and curl your long, thick, totally-not-at-all-extension-enhanced hair before heading to homeroom?